Day of Past

After many years of hiatus from badminton, I got to play some today. Jane and i were terrible, my shuttlecock-racquet contact rate was 80%. Bending over for the shuttlecocks on the ground is a part and parcel of the overall exercise. A Nicholas and a SomeonewhosenameIdidn’tcatch were awfully nice to us, pairing up with us for doubles matches. There was a match in which Jane and I were a pair, we very nearly beat them! And it wasn’t because they switched to their weaker hands! They were good sport, letting us have a bit of fun before humiliating us with 10 consecutive points in the end.
I just came back from a school band reunion with a difference. Instead of the usual crew, we met up with members spanning 6,7 years. Was so happy that one of my favouritest person in band attended, of course I had to grandly pretend that I have forgotten her.
Was supposed to go out again, an after-dinner party, but I guess it’ll be another time. I’ve exerted enough energy to whisk conversation out of thin air for the day.
Diffidence remains a big hindrance to me, I hesitated during badminton, I hesitated to mingle with the seniors, some of which I don’t even remember. I could have played better in the first few rounds if I had not doubted myself so much and would have much more fun if I had just walked up and joined the conversations. I latched on to Hui Li’s confidence and ease. Things would be a lot different if she was not there being her extremely approachable self.
I’m working on it, I am! Lynnie, you think you might be anti-social? Try being me >.<
Socialphobia. Fear of people – this can be crowds, speaking in front of groups (Glassophobia), meeting strangers, even being afraid of interacting with family member. Often diagnosed as extreme shyness. Self-esteem, being judged by others, rejection, embarrassment and acceptance may all need to be addressed.
Really, I need to get rid of this ridiculous fear. It’s rather pathetic too. I’ve been trying so hard to overcome it, one day, I hope to interact with others on cue, not after I’ve readied myself 10, 15 minutes.

Advertisement